The ancient lands.


    Red Zezi-Mass - A Tale of Tescia.

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    Moran



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    Post by Moran December 10th 2012, 10:13 pm

    Mly's Mlair, somewhere in the lowest reaches of the realm of Tescia. A few minutes past midnight, Mahlfember 10th.

    "Bah," Mly muttered to himself. "Eleven days until my favorite day on the entire calendar, ... and as usual, it's overshadowed by Zezima's holiday." He leaned back in his throne, flicking his head over the back of the seat. "Why can't I have any prime time? They even changed the name of the month. ... Over the course of a quite long time, but still!"

    Mly grumbled angrily and slouched in his throne. "Hmph." Suddenly, he righted himself, taking on a more erect, deliberate posture in his throne, legs crossed, and leaned over slightly, supporting his head on his hand, and his hand on his arm, his arm on his leg.

    "TARA!" Mly called out. "Only eleven days 'til the twenty-first of Mlyfember, the solstice! You've begun preparations, yes? The wretched bio-weapon is gone as well, correct?"
    TARA appeared before him, seemingly from nowhere. "Yes, sir. The sno--... the 'highly lethal anti-Mly biological weapon disguised as harmless crystalline water' sent by Zezima is being evaporated by the shields, sir. But, there's a ... small problem."
    "Mm?" Mly muttered, clearly hardly paying attention.
    "It's in an endless cycle, sir. When we evaporate it, it just goes up into the sky and condenses again, and the density of it up there is blocking out large quantities of light and heat; all of Tescia is getting colder, bit by bit."
    "... How is this a problem? The shields can hold forever at such low power."
    "Well, sir, Tescian blood freezes around the freezing point of water. They can only do so much to keep warm as the temperature drops well below that critical threshold."
    "Hmmm, blood ... freezing, you say? The squishy mortals can survive that, right?"
    "Sir, they-... Sir-..." TARA stumbled over her words, trying to find some way explain in detail that they can't, and why they can't, in a way her creator could understand in his infinite aloofness about and apathy toward Tescian biology and affairs. Finally, she gave up, and said simply: "No."
    "Well, I don't care! As long as the disgusting white chemical stays away from me!"

    TARA sighed. "Very well, sir. As for the preparations, we're mostly prepared already. The altar has been modified to fit your ... desired ... new ... form, sir. The lunar power collectors, relays, and condensers are all set up in their proper places. However, projections show that ... the snowstorm will be too strong on the solstice; we won't be able to collect enough power, or perhaps any power at all."
    "Y-... You won't!? And how will I rebuild myself!? After the battering I took at Vexxia!? You expect me to do it the old way, sloppy and horribly energy-inefficient, or perhaps wait until next year!?"
    "Honestly, sir, I expect you to realize the snow is more harmful if kept out than let in and lower the shields, for one."
    Mly growled a deep growl. "... Fine! Do it!"
    TARA made a quick flick of the wrist. "Done."
    "Good," Mly murmured. "Are we in the clear now? Will the snowstorm die away in time?"
    "Well... No, sir. It's become quite self-sustaining at this point. It's also all but stationary. It would take until a few days past Zezi-Mass for it to begin moving south and raining itself out. We'll need... extra help to get it cleared away in time."

    There was a long, awkward moment of silence. Suddenly, Mly jerked violently forward. "N-no! You can't possibly mean--! Collaborating with... him!?"
    TARA hid her face in her hands. "Yes, sir, I do. In order to get the cold out of the way, you need the help of... Lanta Claus."
    "He'd never agree to make a deal with me, damn it, you fool!"
    TARA showed her face again. "Sir, it's all we can do to try."
    "... Fine, fine! Put him on-screen!"
    TARA stepped to the side and outstretched her arm toward the far side of the room. A glowing portal opened, and after several minutes, the pure-white faded away to show the face of a little girl. Little Miss Star.
    "Oh, you. Is your father there, girl?"
    Star stared blankly at Mly, with a look of mild terror on her face. "N-no, but my mommy is."
    "Let me talk to her. It's important business with your father. Your brain's too small and disused to retain my message, I'm sure. Hopefully she stands a chance, at least."
    "O-okay." She looked all around, then called out. "Mommy! Someone says he really needs to talk to daddy!" With that the little girl ran off to somewhere out of the field of view.

    Some minutes of waiting later, Mistress Pianta Claus came into view. "I can't let you talk to Lan' right now, he's very sick, an--... Mly!? What the hell are you doing calling us!? I imagine Lanta has a-a-a-... restraining order against you by now, or something!"
    "Well he doesn't. Is he at least awake, in his mind, and able to talk!? It's highly important, damn you!"
    "He is, but I'm not gonna let you talk to him. I wouldn't let you talk to him if he were perfectly healthy, if I could help it."
    "Let me talk to the man damn it!"
    TARA suddenly stepped into view. "P-please excuse Sir's rudeness, Miss Claus. I think-... I think you know how he is. He does have a legitimate reason for calling, I assure you, or he wouldn't have."
    Pianta thought for a long moment, before sighing and hanging her head. "Fine." Her eyes glanced around for a long time. "Hang on, though."
    "... What are you looking for, idiot!? Let me talk to Lanta!"
    "I don't want you to see the layout of our home, jackass! Knowing you you'd use it to develop a plan to murder us all! ... Ah, there's something." A sudden black draped over the view portal, and for a time footsteps were heard as bits of light flooded in and illuminated the inside of the cloth.
    "... Honey? Mly and his... thing... want to talk to you. Apparently it's important, and hopefully it isn't a threat on your life."
    A wheezed, strained, deep voice was heard. "Oh, goodness. Can't it wait? What could they want with me that's so important, really?"
    "I don't know, dear, they didn't say. They're on the line right now."
    "I doubt it's anything good for me, please tell them to leave me alone..."
    "Damn it!" Mly screeched, filling both his throne room and Lanta's bedroom with his thunderous, raging voice. "This is of the utmost importance! I need to talk to you now!"
    Light suddenly flooded the picture as the view-port flung out of a startled Pianta's hands, casting the cloth over it off in the air. As the wildly turning image of Lanta's bedroom came into focus over the white of it all, there was a sudden clank. And then another, and in moments the only view was straight up at the ceiling.

    "Fine, fine," Lanta muttered. "I'll talk to you, Mly. I think it's a better alternative to the greatly increased risk of heart attack. Please don't yell that loud again... Darling, please hand me the mirror." Mly's viewing window suddenly shot upward, and flung over, then turned over chaotically, fumblingly for a moment, showing little beyond a blurred image. And then, the face of Lanta Claus.

    "Now, what is it you could possibly want, Mly?"

    ... And so began an utterly ridiculous tale of a series of highly unlikely events, all leading to an even more unlikely hero rising to save Zezi-Mass.

    (NB: This is in Crazy Gadget because it's decidedly one of my "non-srs" stories.)
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    Moran



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    Red Zezi-Mass - A Tale of Tescia. Empty Re: Red Zezi-Mass - A Tale of Tescia.

    Post by Moran December 11th 2012, 8:11 pm

    A quickly thrown up outpost in the far north, somewhere in the harsh frozen wastelands of north Tescia, Ezoa, and the ice shelf-covered ocean between. The next morning.

    "I am tired of this snow, TARA!" Mly yelled. "We leave the Mlair and get away from it for just a short time, and now we're back in it!"
    "Technically it's ice now, sir," replied TARA.
    "I don't care! It's too white, and I can hardly see out there. What are we doing here again?"
    "This is base Ezoa-Gamma-Five, sir. I arranged for a declining Ezoan lord to die, and bought this part of his fief. It's as close to The North Hole as one can get without entering Lanta Claus's private property. This base was built to help facilitate our ... relations with Mr. Lanta."
    Mly sighed and hung his head. "Whatever! Let's just get this over with as soon as possible so I can get these ridiculous white fuzzy cuffs off of my glorious robes!"
    "That reminds me, sir. You need to dye your robe red. And you probably should have done it before you sewed those on."
    "Red!? That's a disgusting color. It makes me look like I'm covered in blood."
    "Please don't break character, sir. You don't know what mortal blood looks like, and if you were covered in it you probably wouldn't care. Remember?"
    "Oh, right, right. You! Erase that part of the story!"
    No.
    "Why not!?"
    Because you're a raving lunatic, and I find this funny. Continuing now.

    "Red. ... Why not black!? I always wear a black robe. Why do I have to wear red for this?"
    "Because that's Lanta Claus's uniform colors, sir. And you're going to be doing his job, so you need his uniform."
    "Why can't I do his job in my uniform!?"
    "Small children are terrified of your appearance, sir. And that's the opposite of the desired effect. Now, while you prepare your uniform, I will be negotiating with Father Lime to switch Mlyfember 21st with the 25th."
    "... Wait, what!? Why do I have to keep my end of the deal first? Doesn't Lanta trust me?"
    "Nobody trusts you, sir, because when they do you go back on deals and backstab them."
    "Hrm. Damn it, why can't he be more gullible!?"
    "Because you made him less gullible, sir. I'm sorry to report that he, like most, is capable of adapting."
    Mly growled, then made a dismissing motion with his hand. "Just go! I have a needlessly flamboyant uniform to make."
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    Moran



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    Red Zezi-Mass - A Tale of Tescia. Empty Re: Red Zezi-Mass - A Tale of Tescia.

    Post by Moran December 15th 2012, 12:28 am

    Another year, another Christmas-like story half-completed and scrapped.

    Woo.

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