Hey, kids! It's everyone's favorite cuddler, Army! Listen up, because I have a very special message for you today! You're going to learn how to not be a doormat! Won't that be fun? Girls out there, if you disagree with what I'm about to say, shut up, because you're wrong! Ok, boys, if you really like a certain girl, and you want to be her knight in shining armor, here's what you do: Don't. That's right boys! Don't even try. Not because you have no chance (which the case may very likely be), but because girls don't like guys who pursue them.
See, the girls mind is wired differently from ours. It's completely illogical. Sure, we do stupid things, but we know full well in advance that it's stupid. We just do it anyway, because we're stupid. Not illogical, just stupid. Now the girl is very, very smart. That's why 8 times out of 10, the valedictorian of your very school, is a female. Now along with that intelligence, comes complete chaos. The girl is wired to be incredibly illogical. Why? Because children are illogical and women (totally not being sexist) are actually genetically suited to birth and raise children. Using their intelligence, they teach the child, and due to being completely illogically minded, they relate to it. We are the other hand are stupid and logical. We come up with plans and procedures, but those are usually terrible and fail which is why we're more inclined to wash a child in a sink full of dirty dishes. There is already water there, so two birds with one stone, amirite?
Anyway, boys always come up with a plan to court a girl. When we see one, we come up with some sort of procedure to follow to get her to do whatever it is we'd like to do with them and use trial and error to find a working one. When said plan works, we see no need to change it. Girls on the other hand are much smarter. They know we're making some sort of plan, and they let us do whatever. However, this is completely illogical because they also know that we are idiots. Why are they letting us take the wheel when they know we're headed straight for a tree? Because they are illogical. Smart, but illogical. Remember that. Men: Logical and stupid. Women: Illogical and smart.
Now in order for us to get this to work in our favor (I keep spelling words like a Brit and Firefox keeps getting mad at me [favour, armour, etc.]), we need to be smart. You may be tempted to just think illogically, but that's your stupid man brain talking. Think smart. Yes it's harder, but you know. What you do, is not try at all. This works on both sides of the woman brain. It works the smart side because they see that we're good guys. They know that we are suitable partners and will be good dating material. This works their illogical side because usually the guy makes his advances known. She will think (if you do it right) something is wrong. The illogical brain will then think something is wrong with themselves. At this point you will probably see signs. Whether they really want you or not, they will probably start to try too hard. Coming on strong, using double entendre, and wearing make up (or looking more glamorous in general) are all good signs. If she starts to get really comfortable with you by telling secrets or getting touchy-feely (not flirtatious) you've screwed up. Congratulations. You've made a new best friend. In short, stop being so nice to them. They're illogical, remember? I've heard of several of my friends (including my "ex") breaking up with guys because they're "too nice".
I hope this helps guys. Remember, don't let a girl tell you any different.
*This is in no way a full proof way to get a plan, it might fail, I take no responsibility for a broken heart, but I will make you feel better with cuddles if you get one. :Wink Wink: *
See, the girls mind is wired differently from ours. It's completely illogical. Sure, we do stupid things, but we know full well in advance that it's stupid. We just do it anyway, because we're stupid. Not illogical, just stupid. Now the girl is very, very smart. That's why 8 times out of 10, the valedictorian of your very school, is a female. Now along with that intelligence, comes complete chaos. The girl is wired to be incredibly illogical. Why? Because children are illogical and women (totally not being sexist) are actually genetically suited to birth and raise children. Using their intelligence, they teach the child, and due to being completely illogically minded, they relate to it. We are the other hand are stupid and logical. We come up with plans and procedures, but those are usually terrible and fail which is why we're more inclined to wash a child in a sink full of dirty dishes. There is already water there, so two birds with one stone, amirite?
Anyway, boys always come up with a plan to court a girl. When we see one, we come up with some sort of procedure to follow to get her to do whatever it is we'd like to do with them and use trial and error to find a working one. When said plan works, we see no need to change it. Girls on the other hand are much smarter. They know we're making some sort of plan, and they let us do whatever. However, this is completely illogical because they also know that we are idiots. Why are they letting us take the wheel when they know we're headed straight for a tree? Because they are illogical. Smart, but illogical. Remember that. Men: Logical and stupid. Women: Illogical and smart.
Now in order for us to get this to work in our favor (I keep spelling words like a Brit and Firefox keeps getting mad at me [favour, armour, etc.]), we need to be smart. You may be tempted to just think illogically, but that's your stupid man brain talking. Think smart. Yes it's harder, but you know. What you do, is not try at all. This works on both sides of the woman brain. It works the smart side because they see that we're good guys. They know that we are suitable partners and will be good dating material. This works their illogical side because usually the guy makes his advances known. She will think (if you do it right) something is wrong. The illogical brain will then think something is wrong with themselves. At this point you will probably see signs. Whether they really want you or not, they will probably start to try too hard. Coming on strong, using double entendre, and wearing make up (or looking more glamorous in general) are all good signs. If she starts to get really comfortable with you by telling secrets or getting touchy-feely (not flirtatious) you've screwed up. Congratulations. You've made a new best friend. In short, stop being so nice to them. They're illogical, remember? I've heard of several of my friends (including my "ex") breaking up with guys because they're "too nice".
I hope this helps guys. Remember, don't let a girl tell you any different.
*This is in no way a full proof way to get a plan, it might fail, I take no responsibility for a broken heart, but I will make you feel better with cuddles if you get one. :Wink Wink: *
