Pickles, Pickles? Why thank you.
This is a new series I am starting, which is going to tell the never ending tales of my life. Full of pickles and fast food franchises like Wendy's. The reason all of my life is being put into stories for people like yourself is...well I'm like a barbie doll, I do everything and I have numerous versions of me. I go white, black, blasian what ever you want to call it, and my life is just too OUTRAGEOUS to be put on hold. So sit back, relax, have a pickle of two and enjoy the first tale in my saga.
1: Finding a job.
Movievoiceyourhearintrailers: All of hear life Pickles has been a freeloader....
But NOW HER LIFE IS GOING TO GO CRAAZAAY!
She has to find a job and....
Me: What?
MovieVoice:...
Me: I have to get a job?
MovieVoice: Uh....
Me: Get out.
MovieVoice: Bu-
Me: GET THE FUDGE OUT!
Whew, that was close. That loser wanted me to get a job, what a punk. Whatever................OH! Yes, I forgot you were there. Anywho, if I must explain myself through this script, I did have to get a job. But it wasn't for long. It all started as I was eating breakfast one morning...
SCENARIO:
Me: *munch* *munch*
Mom: Pickles?
Me: *munch* *munch*
Mom: Oooh, picckllles?
Me: *munch* *munch*
Mom: PICKLES GOD DAMMIT!
Me: Yes?
Mom: It's time you get a job, you're almost out of the jar.
Me: But Mom!
Mom: Don't "mom" me. You go outside and find yourself a job!
Me: *is thrown outside of the house* Whatever, I can do it.
*sees a nearby AppleBee's*
Me: Oh....my....god....
*walks in*
Me: It's like this was my fate. *goes up to manager-lady person.*
Manager: Yes?
Me: I demand a job.
Manager: I'm sorry, we're not hiring.
Me: lolwhut?
Manager: Maybe if there is available spot I'd call you.
Me: Oh...so if one of your employees were to... disappear, I would- I mean a job would be open.
Manager: That is correct.
Me: I see I see. Well, g'bye.
What the woman did not know was I secretly walked into the kitchen and....spoke with one of her employees. I then left the scene.
Me: *walking from a distance*
Manager: AHH!!!!
Me: I'm so bad!
Randomfatwoman: YOU AIN'T BAD! YOU AINT NUTIN!
Me: You get back in your cage you!
So jyeah, I didn't get the job and that B*TCH hired someone else. It probably was because of my smile, she did look afraid as I gave her the ninjaglare. I continued on my way as I saw another franchise....McDonalds.
Me: *walks in* Hello?
Cashregisterperson: Yes?
Me:*Knocks Cash register person out* Now, I'm sure to get the job. *changes into uniform* That's better.
Little did I know that some people actually EAT out of this DISGUSTING food facility.
Customer: Hi, I would like a number 2, a number 6, and a number 4.
Me: What?
Customer: 2, 6 and 4.
Me: You want all of that? For yourself?
Customer: Yes...
Me: *mumblestoself* fatarse...
Customer: Exacuse meh?
Me: I simply stated you were fat, if you are going to EAT this.
Customer: You know what? I'll just go to Wendy's, their prices are more reasonable.
Me: Wendy's eh?
So, I quickly relocated to the nearest Wendy's, my third and final stop.
Me: Sup....
Worker: ....
Me: Job...ya'll got one?
Worker: Uh, you can flip burgers if you want.
Me: M'kay..
So, I went into the kitchen and started to flip burger while rejecting in a corner. But then...the inevitable happened.
Someone wanted one of my burgahs.
Worker: One number 6!
Me: OMIGAWD! OMIGAWD!
Worker: Uh....you do know what that is?
ME: OF...COURSE!
I then quickly had to take mah babies out of that hellhole.
Me: LEAVE, LIKE A RIVER THAT FLOWS! *throws meat patties out of the window.
Worker: What the f*ck are you doing?
Me: You'll never catch me or my chirren!
*Physical by Olivia Newton John starts to play*
Worker: Get out!
Me: Bu-
Worker: GET THE FUDGE OUT!
So, I didn't get a job. But I wasn't done yet! I was thrown out of the house so I had to live in a barbershop. But little did anyone or I know that I was going to do something no one ever imagin- I'm hungry. *eats one of meat patties* Wait...NOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
This is a new series I am starting, which is going to tell the never ending tales of my life. Full of pickles and fast food franchises like Wendy's. The reason all of my life is being put into stories for people like yourself is...well I'm like a barbie doll, I do everything and I have numerous versions of me. I go white, black, blasian what ever you want to call it, and my life is just too OUTRAGEOUS to be put on hold. So sit back, relax, have a pickle of two and enjoy the first tale in my saga.
1: Finding a job.
Movievoiceyourhearintrailers: All of hear life Pickles has been a freeloader....
But NOW HER LIFE IS GOING TO GO CRAAZAAY!
She has to find a job and....
Me: What?
MovieVoice:...
Me: I have to get a job?
MovieVoice: Uh....
Me: Get out.
MovieVoice: Bu-
Me: GET THE FUDGE OUT!
Whew, that was close. That loser wanted me to get a job, what a punk. Whatever................OH! Yes, I forgot you were there. Anywho, if I must explain myself through this script, I did have to get a job. But it wasn't for long. It all started as I was eating breakfast one morning...
SCENARIO:
Me: *munch* *munch*
Mom: Pickles?
Me: *munch* *munch*
Mom: Oooh, picckllles?
Me: *munch* *munch*
Mom: PICKLES GOD DAMMIT!
Me: Yes?
Mom: It's time you get a job, you're almost out of the jar.
Me: But Mom!
Mom: Don't "mom" me. You go outside and find yourself a job!
Me: *is thrown outside of the house* Whatever, I can do it.
*sees a nearby AppleBee's*
Me: Oh....my....god....
*walks in*
Me: It's like this was my fate. *goes up to manager-lady person.*
Manager: Yes?
Me: I demand a job.
Manager: I'm sorry, we're not hiring.
Me: lolwhut?
Manager: Maybe if there is available spot I'd call you.
Me: Oh...so if one of your employees were to... disappear, I would- I mean a job would be open.
Manager: That is correct.
Me: I see I see. Well, g'bye.
What the woman did not know was I secretly walked into the kitchen and....spoke with one of her employees. I then left the scene.
Me: *walking from a distance*
Manager: AHH!!!!
Me: I'm so bad!
Randomfatwoman: YOU AIN'T BAD! YOU AINT NUTIN!
Me: You get back in your cage you!
So jyeah, I didn't get the job and that B*TCH hired someone else. It probably was because of my smile, she did look afraid as I gave her the ninjaglare. I continued on my way as I saw another franchise....McDonalds.
Me: *walks in* Hello?
Cashregisterperson: Yes?
Me:*Knocks Cash register person out* Now, I'm sure to get the job. *changes into uniform* That's better.
Little did I know that some people actually EAT out of this DISGUSTING food facility.
Customer: Hi, I would like a number 2, a number 6, and a number 4.
Me: What?
Customer: 2, 6 and 4.
Me: You want all of that? For yourself?
Customer: Yes...
Me: *mumblestoself* fatarse...
Customer: Exacuse meh?
Me: I simply stated you were fat, if you are going to EAT this.
Customer: You know what? I'll just go to Wendy's, their prices are more reasonable.
Me: Wendy's eh?
So, I quickly relocated to the nearest Wendy's, my third and final stop.
Me: Sup....
Worker: ....
Me: Job...ya'll got one?
Worker: Uh, you can flip burgers if you want.
Me: M'kay..
So, I went into the kitchen and started to flip burger while rejecting in a corner. But then...the inevitable happened.
Someone wanted one of my burgahs.
Worker: One number 6!
Me: OMIGAWD! OMIGAWD!
Worker: Uh....you do know what that is?
ME: OF...COURSE!
I then quickly had to take mah babies out of that hellhole.
Me: LEAVE, LIKE A RIVER THAT FLOWS! *throws meat patties out of the window.
Worker: What the f*ck are you doing?
Me: You'll never catch me or my chirren!
*Physical by Olivia Newton John starts to play*
Worker: Get out!
Me: Bu-
Worker: GET THE FUDGE OUT!
So, I didn't get a job. But I wasn't done yet! I was thrown out of the house so I had to live in a barbershop. But little did anyone or I know that I was going to do something no one ever imagin- I'm hungry. *eats one of meat patties* Wait...NOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
