Corrupted Wishes

Granted. Vomiting is.

I wish I could download games off the Internet with my Wii and 360.

Granted, but the Internet is full of viruses.

I wish I had a 360 and a PS3 as well as having a Wii (which I have now).

Granted, but the Wii is disappointed.

I wish Im bored.

Granted, but being bored is not nice.

I wish I had grey hair.

Granted, but people laugh at you until you start wearing a hat (then they laugh at you even more).

I wish I could go to Sonic Drive-in wearing a Sonic costume.

Phantom wrote:Granted, but people laugh at you until you start wearing a hat (then they laugh at you even more).

I wish I could go to Sonic Drive-in wearing a Sonic costume.

Granted but you will get attacked by people due to the dislike of Sonic.
I wish I was a Pokemon.

Granted, but you will get attacked by other Pokemon.

I wish I was the CEO of Jaguar Cars Ltd.

Granted, but because you end up only having the business intelligence of an elementary school dropout, profit dives into negative values and Jaguar Cars Ltd becomes bankrupt.

ERROR: NO WISH FOUND TO CORRUPT.

I wish my spine and neck were all in perfect alignment.

Granted, but you lose an arm and a leg.

I wish for the fastest, safest car in the world.

Granted, but it's too pricey.

I wish I wasn't sweating now.

Granted, but you sweat again by the end of the day and keep sweating for the rest of your life.

I wish that I had a large bag of candy that was just as nutritious as a bunch of fruit, which I could eat with no side effects.

Granted, but candy is unhealthy.

I wish I didn't have premonitions

Granted, but you soon realize that people think it's awesome to have premonitions of future events, and you regret it.

I wish my car's interior and exterior were clean.

...Wait, how is candy that is as nutritious as fruit unhealthy?

Granted, but your radiator gets clogged and your car has a coolant leak, resulting in your engine overheating and receiving irreparable damage.

I wish that Wumbology would not overtake me.

Granted, but it soon becomes clear that the field of Wumbology is becoming quite lucrative--and you missed out on it.

I wish I was not such a procrastinator.

Granted, but what does doing something the minute you get it achieve anyway?

I wish I had more muscle.

Granted,but its only on your right hand.

I wish I had rocket shoes.

Granted, but they slow you down too much

I wish I wasn't ill.

Granted, but now everyone around you is ill, and they blame you for it.

I wish the convention I'm going to later this month is worth the trip.

Granted, but value for money is never good.

I wish I was not as stomach achey.

Granted, but you now have the world's worst tooth ache for the rest of your life.

I wish for Modern Warfare 3 to come out next year.

Granted, but MW3 will not be as good as you expected.

I wish I was 18.

Granted, but your hair will never grow back again.

I wish for an unlimited amount of wishes.